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The music filled the bus and the driver tapped his chubby fingers to the rhythm.

“Pop pop pop pop pop pop pop pop something/Pop pop pop pop pop pop pop pop something/We dey pop champagne, pop champagne…”

He cradled the
steering wheel to his huge belly, his fat cheeks eternally seeming on
the verge of breaking into a smile. You could see how hard he had tried
to groom himself; the long nails chipped in parts; the dark oily hair
cut in the style called Gallas, tribute to the former Arsenal player
who made it so famous.

He seemed a bit too
old for relaxers and shady hairstyles, but the twinkle in his eye said
that perhaps he knew that, but so what? His check-shirt hugged his gut
so tight the buttons appeared ready to pop at the next big meal of
amala and ewedu washed down with the inevitable Gulder. Oh, yes, he
looked like a man who enjoyed his food with some brew.

But he was not a
big talker, preferring to limit his vocal efforts to singing the chorus
of the Dr. Sid/D’Banj song. When an angry driver overtook our bus,
hurling insults at him for no apparent reason, he didn’t even shout
back. He gazed placidly at the fellow through his window, and placing
an index finger to the side of his head, he turned it sharply, like a
screw. At Ogudu, he stopped to pick up an odd couple; a smallish fellow
in the garish colours of the LASTMA uniform and a much taller man. It
was soon clear that he knew them both. On spying the shorter guy, he
began to protest after they entered: “Oh no, no!”, shaking his head
like one who had committed an irredeemable blunder.

“Egbon,” he said,
addressing the tall chap and pointedly ignoring the uniformed fellow,
“I seriously thought you were alone. Seriously. I don’t usually carry
these wicked people.”

Goliath chuckled.

“Because of me,” he said, settling down, “Carry am today, I beg.”

The LASTMA official
pursed his lips, predicting dire consequences for errant drivers who
didn’t know how to show respect for authority. The driver made a face
and laughed. Suddenly, a bike man cut into our lane from the blind side
and went speeding past without a care.

“The people who drive okada are crazy,” he said quietly, “Every single one of them.”

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you an oxymoron: a danfo driver with no stress.

Sitting beside him
up front, I again wondered what it was about fat men that makes you
feel comfortable in their company. They seemed more able to absorb
life’s pressures, to hide their neuroses under all those layers of
flesh. I remembered Caesar saying to Anthony: “Let me have men about me
that are fat; sleek-headed men and such as sleep o’ nights,” and I
thought, the Roman general would have loved this bus driver.

I got down at Ojota
feeling quite mellow, as if I had indeed popped some champagne, and I
began to see Lagosians differently. At the criminally built steps of
the overhead bridge at Ojota, an elderly lady with a tall load
stumbled, and a dashing young woman in an Afro and elegant shoes
stepped forward: “Mama, let me help you with the load,” she said. The
elderly woman refused, but the smile on her wrinkled face was priceless.

At the other end of the bridge, I ran into a schoolboy helping a blind man negotiate the bustle, and they were both laughing.

“Can they not see too?” asked the blind man every time someone
brushed past him. And their laughter would resume. I looked around me.
Everyone seemed to be in a good mood, all the Lagos madness gone. It
looked like my danfo driver’s attitude was catching. Yeah, pop the
champagne jare. Eko o ni baje.

Alcohol causes
nearly 4 percent of deaths worldwide, more than AIDS, tuberculosis or
violence, the World Health Organisation has warned. Rising incomes have
triggered more drinking in heavily populated countries in Africa and
Asia, including India and South Africa, and binge drinking is a problem
in many developed countries, the United Nations agency said. Yet
alcohol control policies are weak and remain a low priority for most
governments despite drinking’s heavy toll on society from road
accidents, violence, disease, child neglect and job absenteeism, it
said. Approximately 2.5 million people die each year from alcohol
related causes, the WHO said in its “Global Status Report on Alcohol
and Health.” “The harmful use of alcohol is especially fatal for
younger age groups and alcohol is the world’s leading risk factor for
death among males aged 15-59,” the report found. In Russia and the
Commonwealth of Independent States (CIS), every fifth death is due to
harmful drinking, the highest rate. Binge drinking, which often leads
to risky behaviour, is now prevalent in Brazil, Kazakhstan, Mexico,
Russia, South Africa and Ukraine, and rising elsewhere, according to
the WHO.

“Worldwide, about
11 percent of drinkers have weekly heavy episodic drinking occasions,
with men outnumbering women by four to one. Men consistently engage in
hazardous drinking at much higher levels than women in all regions,”
the report said. Health ministers from the WHO’s 193 member states
agreed last May to try to curb binge drinking and other growing forms
of excessive alcohol use through higher taxes on alcoholic drinks and
tighter marketing restrictions.

Alcohol is a causal
factor in 60 types of diseases and injuries, according to WHO’s first
report on alcohol since 2004. Its consumption has been linked to
cirrhosis of the liver, epilepsy, poisonings, road traffic accidents,
violence, and several types of cancer, including cancers of the
colorectum, breast, larynx and liver. “Six or seven years ago we didn’t
have strong evidence of a causal relationship between drinking and
breast cancer. Now we do,” Vladimir Poznyak, head of WHO’s substance
abuse unit who coordinated the report, told Reuters.

Alcohol consumption rates vary greatly, from high levels in
developed countries, to the lowest in North Africa, sub-Saharan Africa,
and southern Asia, whose large Muslim populations often abstain from
drinking. Homemade or illegally produced alcohol – falling outside
governmental controls and tax nets – accounts for nearly 30 percent of
total worldwide adult consumption.

The forgery of court document is a
criminal offence which carries a seven-year jail term. But the Nigerian
Army does not seem to consider the offence such a big deal. When told
how Paul Egbo, a Major in the army’s medical corps, allegedly forged
divorce papers to enable him leave his wife and take up with another
woman, a female army officer, an official letter from the Chief of Army
staff said the offence is of no concern to the army.

In May 2006, Mr Egbo, a native of Delta
State, while serving in Maiduguri, Borno State, decided he wanted out
of his 12-year marriage to Uche Egbo. He called Mrs. Egbo, a house wife
and mother of their three children living in their home at the Ojo
military cantonment in Lagos State, and told her that the marriage is
over because God had told him to marry another woman.

He then changed his salary account from
which Mrs. Egbo and the children take money for their monthly upkeep.
Mrs. Egbo remembers that for the next eighteen months, up till
September 23, 2007, her husband and father of their children only came
home once; and that was to pack his belongings.

“He came from Maiduguri to pack his
things. I told him that if he takes everything how does he want us to
cope, that why has he abandoned his family, that he should make
arrangement for his children’s upkeep,” Mrs Egbo said, “Instead he
accused me of being a criminal and got me arrested. I was taken to the
guardroom and would have remained there if not for an officer who
intervened. But he took everything and left us with nothing.”

Mrs. Egbo’s ordeal was not over. On May
20, 2008, Military Police personnel came to her home and handed her a
Lagos State High Court order dated December 31, 2007, which declared
her marriage to Mr. Egbo dissolved. On the orders of her husband, they
had come to evict her with immediate effect from the house.

“It was only because the cantonment
commandant, Lieutenant Colonel Apere, intervened that I was spared. He
instructed Paul to come and sort things out himself because the army
gave the house to him and not me,” said Mrs. Egbo, who hails from
Anambra State.

Being the only child of an elderly
pensioner mother, Mrs. Egbo was totally dependent on her husband. Now
abandoned, she became a wreck. Unable to bear the psychological trauma
any longer, she moved out of the barracks in September 2008 and began
squatting with some acquaintances.

To put food on the table, she started
doing menial jobs. She could not pay her children’s school fees, and
they had to miss one year of school. She and her three children
practically lived off handouts from sympathizers.

A case of forgery

It was in this condition that Kayode
Ogunjobi, a lawyer, met Mrs. Egbo. Filled with compassion, he took up
her case free of charge and ran a check on the decree nisi and the
decree absolute allegedly issued by the court dissolving the marriage.
The response from the Lagos State judiciary in a letter dated July 17,
2008 revealed that Mr. Egbo’s documents were fake.

“We have checked our records and we
report that the document did not emanate from the High Court of Lagos
State as Suit No. HD/241/2007 does not exist in our records,” wrote
Mariam Emeya, then a Chief Magistrate. “Furthermore it is very obvious
that the document is fake as Mr. A. Ola Dada, the ACR (Assistant Chief
Registrar) Litigation who purportedly signed the letter in 2007 retired
in 2005.”

Mrs. Emeya, who at the time was also
the deputy chief registrar of administration in the Lagos State High
Court, further observed that a decree nisi only becomes absolute after
three months but Mr. Egbo’s decree absolute terminated his marriage
after two months.

“In the final analysis, there is no
indication of the court or judge who purportedly dissolved the said
marriage. It is therefore clear that the document is fake,” concluded
Mrs. Emeya.

The army didn’t care

In December 2008, Mr. Ogunjobi, through
Rouq & Company Solicitors and Advocates, petitioned the Office of
the Chief of Army Staff, then headed by Abdulrahaman Dambazau, a
lieutenant general; and Mike Okiro, the then Inspector-General of
Police. While the Police never responded, the Army through its Special
Investigation Bureau (SIB) in Apapa, Lagos State, between August and
September 2009, investigated Mr. Egbo’s forgery case and the abandoning
of his family responsibilities.

“We were invited by the SIB and we
went. The investigation was concluded and the report forwarded. They
said they were sending recommendations to Defence Headquarters, and
that it is an internal thing, so they will get back to us when they
need us. And that is the last we have heard from them, till now,” Mr.
Ogunjobi said.

By June 2010, the army had still not
responded and Mr. Egbo had not rendered any financial help to his
family in years. During this time, Mrs. Egbo said her husband had
married another woman, a female army captain she identified as Rachael
Gashua, serving in the army’s Military Police Corps in Maiduguri.

After her children were sent away from
school just before their promotion exams for non-payment of school
fees, Mrs. Egbo approached Project Alert, a non-governmental
organisation promoting women rights. They assisted her with N35,000;
and together with the National Human Rights Commission (NHRC)
petitioned the present Chief of Army Staff, Onyeabo Ihejirika, over Mr.
Egbo’s forgery of judicial documents and abandonment of family.

But Mr. Ihejirika’s response to the
Commission was that the army would not entertain the matter. Through
his staff, one Lieutenant Colonel A. A. Ali, via a letter received by
the NHRC on November 22, 2010, the army chief further recommended that
if Mrs. Egbo felt so aggrieved, she could lay her complaints at the law
courts.

“The issues raised are purely domestic
in nature and should be settle between the spouses. On the other hand,
if she feels strongly about the alleged ill treatment by her husband,
she may take up a legal action against him. The Nigeria Army does not
have the capacity to impose a wife on a personnel,” read the letter
signed by Mr. Ali “for Chief of Army Staff”.

Mr. Egbo could not be reached on his
mobile telephone. When contacted, his lawyer, Jonah Daniel of KC
Okolodia & Co, said the media does not have any merit in reporting
the case.

“I don’t think it is safe for your
paper to publish this story. Paul’s wife has reported to the Nigerian
army and it’s being investigated,” Mr. Daniel said. “Also the Human
Rights Commission is investigating. This matter is under investigation,
so I don’t know what you want me to say.”

But when asked if he procured the fake
divorce documents for Mr. Egbo, he replied: “I can’t answer that
question. I won’t be part of a campaign of calumny”.

The waiting game

The head of the Directorate of Army
Public Relations, Chris Olukolade, a brigadier-general, when contacted,
requested that he should be left out of the matter.

Kayode Ogunsanya, a lieutenant colonel
and the spokesperson for the Army’s 81 Division, which oversees Bonny
Cantonment, where Mr. Egbo is said to be currently serving, promised to
contact him and then get back to NEXT. Two weeks have gone by and he is
yet to respond. With tears in her eyes Mrs. Egbo said all she wants is
for the father of her children to live up to his parental duties. As
she wakes up early every day to prepare the food she sells on a
roadside, she worries about raising enough money to pay her children’s
school fees, as schools resume February.

“For five years I have been struggling on my own. I have made up my
mind to move on. I am not out for revenge but if Paul wants to divorce,
he should do it the right way. He should also have compassion on his
children and cater for them and not leave them to suffer this way,” Mrs
Egbo said.

All speculations
about who the All Progressives Grand Alliance (APGA) will endorse for
this year’s presidential election were laid to rest last Thursday at
the national convention of the party in Awka, the Anambra State capital.

The party members at the convention endorsed President Goodluck Jonathan unanimously.

Speaking on the
choice, APGA’s national chairman, Victor Umeh, said Mr Jonathan has
proved to be a good friend of the Igbos by doing many things for the
south east zone, thereby leaving APGA no choice than to endorse him
after extensive discussions with members of the party.

Mr. Umeh said the
south east geopolitical zone has not had it so good under any
president,‘‘The president is our friend, he has a listening ear and he
relates well with us. Under his administration, the Niger Bridge got
attention, the Enugu airport has been upgraded, and our brothers can do
business again due to the lifting of ban on importation of certain
items,” Mr Umeh said.

He said the party
had to adopt somebody after no one picked its presidential form, ‘‘
We’ve been involved in discussions with members and we came to a clear
appreciation that there’s only one person, APGA could support and that
is the incumbent president,” he said.

He however said the
party’s support is only for Mr Jonathan and called on members of the
party to vote en masse for the rest of APGA’s candidates in other
elective positions. ‘‘We’re contesting all the other elections and we
want our supporters to return all our other candidates. We have not
merged with anybody.” The motion for the adoption of Jonathan was moved
by the Anambra State deputy governor, Emeka Sibeudu, and seconded by
the national chairman, south west Tayo Sowumi.

Before now the
south east governors under the aegis of the South East Governors’ Forum
chaired by Peter Obi of Anambra State had declared their support for
the president giving similar reasons for supporting him.

INEC was there too

The convention
which was attended by representatives of INEC including the state
resident electoral commissioner, Chukwuemeka Onukogu, also ratified the
decisions taken at the party’s NEC meeting which returned the current
national executive of the party to serve for another four year term.

The event then
moved from the convention venue of Women’s Development Centre to
Ekwueme Square where the party’s candidates were presented to the crowd
of supporters and given the party’s flags. Governorship candidates from
many states of the federation were in attendance. Former information
and communications minister, Dora Akunyili led the senatorial
candidates who were presented with the party’s flags.

Echezona Etiaba,
son of former deputy governor of Anambra State, Virgy Etiaba, who also
attended the convention, stated what the south east will gain by the
adoption of Mr Jonathan by APGA, ‘‘It can never get worse with the
south east by this adoption and it will only get better,’ he said.

Also, the chairman
of Coalition of Lagos State Opposition Political Parties, an umbrella
body of 26 parties, John Uche, said the coalition was formed to provide
a platform for unseating incumbent Lagos State governor, Babatunde
Fashola, whose regime he described as wicked. ‘‘We have the people, we
have the means and we have the structure to remove Mr Fashola. His
so-called achievements are mere photo tricks,’” Mr. Uche said.

The National
publicity secretary of the party, Bernard Akoma ruled out any chances
of reconciliation with Chekwas Okorie, a factional leader of the party,
saying that the issue has been taken care of by the court. Mr. Akoma
said although the matter is still pending at the Supreme Court, he had
no doubt that it will not favour Mr Okorie just as the two previous
judgments had not favoured him.

“APGA will forge ahead without him and as you can see we have been growing from strength to strength,’’ he said.

The occasion was also attended by the party’s national secretary
Sanni Shinkafi; Bianca Ojukwu, special adviser to the president on
Diaspora matters; Tim Menakaya, former health minister; and the host
governor Peter Obi.

As President
Gooodluck Jonathan officially launches his state campaign tour, all
eyes will be on his style of dressing. This is because it has been the
tradition of the president to always identify with his hosts through
their traditional attires during his state visits.

Apart from such
instances where the President has been seen dressed in other Nigerian
attires, his traditional Niger Delta attire has been seen by many as
his trademark.

While the
president’s peculiar dress code has drawn both criticism and
admiration, the man behind his wardrobe describes him as a marketer of
his culture through his customary use of the native Ijaw attire.

Looking at the
dress code of past Nigerian leaders, it could be seen that Mr Jonathan
is not the first to dress consistently in the traditional attire of his
ethnic group. Former President, Olusegun Obasanjo was always in
‘agbada’ and the traditional Yoruba cap. Shehu Shagari and the late
Umar Musa Yar’Adua were always in ‘babbanriga’ and cap, a common dress
in northern Nigeria. Fashion analysts say that this trend may be
indicative of the quest for acceptance and a statement of their
identity as Nigerians and solidarity with their own personal ethnic
groups.

Prince Oyefusi, Chief Executive of NobelAfrik believes that the leaders are trying to identify with their ethnic groups.

The president’s
official clothier, Ebi Spiff, adds said: “That is his official uniform;
portraying his culture anyone on that level should not wear things like
the British attire.” Mr Spiff, in a telephone conversation with NEXT,
said, dark colours appeal to the president and explained he selects
what the country’s number one citizen wears. “To choose his clothes, I
have to consider his mood and the occasion. He likes dark colours and
they bring out his shade.” Explaining the difference between the types
of Niger Delta attires used by the President, Mr Spiff said there are
two kinds.

“The one with the
three buttons is called Woko (jumper) while the other is called Etibo
(which is casual), but the one the president wears more often is the
Woko,” he said.

As the country awaits the different looks of the president during
his nationwide tour, he will certainly give up his trademark for most
of the days of the tour. Who knows, we may even see him in a three
piece suit.