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Last week’s write-up, titled – “Youth Empowerment through
Sports”, was a distraction. We were expected to progress to the second part of
the series on the “Diamond Structure”.

The first part which was neither extensive nor conclusive
introduced the benefits children who are actively involved in sports enjoy. So,
we shall continue to mention other benefits in subsequent write-ups.

The second part, which should have been written last week, and
which should have dealt with the roles of parents/coaches, therefore comes up
today. We apologise and are very sorry for the un-avoidable distraction.

Yes, I agree that there are positive and negative distractions,
but this type of distraction, caused by the state of sports in Nigeria, provides
no form of entertainment or amusement, meant to take the mind off work or
worries, in order to produce a state of relaxation.

The distraction produced by most Nigerian sports administrators,
managers, coaches, ex-internationals, etc., in most cases, diverts attention
and interferes negatively with the level of concentration and attention
required for a normal day-to-day existence.

Some comments made by our sports custodians, get me so
emotionally upset at times, that I have personally come up with an antidote
called laughter as a counter, and relief mechanism. For instance, is it not a
laughable matter, to hear Lars Laggerback say that “age does not matter in
football”?

Well, in order not to be engaged in another distraction today, I
want to believe that Laggerback did not really mean to say it that way. All he
wanted to tell us is that players like Kanu and his age-mates, will still
feature in the starting line-up during the FIFA 2010 World Cup finals in South
Africa, come June/July.

It is also likely that he may appeal to Jay-Jay Okocha and the
likes of Taribo West (the anointed Rock),

Rasheed Yekini (the gangling goal getter), “Mathematical” Segun
Odegbami, Dan “De Bull” Amokachi – the list is endless – to please get out of
retirement and get back to active football playing, in order to represent
Nigeria at the World Cup fiesta. After all, “age does not matter”.

But if Laggerback is serious and means what he said, then, I
call on Ken Anugweje, the President of Nigerian Universities Games Association
(NUGA), who is also a PhD holder in sports medicine, to quickly react to this
comment made by Laggerback. Oh blimey, have I been distracted? May God rescue
us and Nigerian Sports from negative distractions, amen. Now back to our
topic…

The spirit of sportsmanship

Back on track with the Diamond Structure (DS), we concluded last
week, that paramount in the philosophy of the DS, is the need for
parents/coaches to instil the importance of good sportsmanship in Nigerian
children, teenagers and the youth. Cheating; losing one’s temper; negative
criticisms of team mates; coaches; referees and opposing players; trash-talks;
arguing referees’ calls and other negative conducts must not be encouraged to
be exhibited by Nigerian youngsters.

We wish to repeat for the sake of emphasis, that parents should
please understand that coaching children is an honour and a directive from God
Himself. Otherwise, why should God direct that children should be taught
(coached) when they are still very young? It is also a great privilege that
carries with it, very massive responsibilities, that should contribute to the
holistic development of our children, teenagers and youth.

What, then, are parents required to do? Permit me to quickly
state – before we continue – that I am no expert on this subject.

I am in fact still an apprentice – a student. Nonetheless, I
wish to share some of what I experienced with some American parents, who were
part of a training programme organised by Paulo De Souza (Junior) of the
Brazilian Soccer Journey.

The training programme took us to the Pele Soccer Schools, the
Santos Football Club and the Litoral Football Club. The parents involved in the
training programme also doubled as coaches/trainers of their children, who were
also part of the programme. What you are about to be fed with, are therefore a
combination of my experiences in Brazil, England, Germany, South Africa and
most importantly, my interactions with parents in Lagos, Nigeria, while we were
running the Brazilian Soccer Schools programmes at the National Stadium in
Surulere.

Tips for parents

i. You (parent) must be your own child’s role model.

This is very important for the actualisation of the diamond
structure philosophy. Your child is watching you very closely and will imitate
you at the slightest opportunity. So please watch it. For instance, when you
are watching a football match or any sporting activity on TV, with your family
or with your child, watch your tongue. Do not criticise or demean officials,
the coaches or any of the athletes or footballers. If the athletes or
footballers are still young, it is best for you to utter words of encouragement
and appreciation.

ii. Do not force your child into any sport.

Allow the child to be free to choose. In case your child does
not show any interest in sporting activities, encourage him or her, but please
do not compel or threaten that child. Some children are slow starters. Remember
that you should be a role model, so, if you are actively involved, your child
will naturally emulate you.

iii. Take your child with you to your work-out sessions.

Allow your child see you enjoy the sporting activities you are
involved in and seize that opportunity to model the philosophy or doctrine you
have been talking to that child about.

iv. Set the standard.

You owe your child the responsibility to teach him/her the
values of good sportsmanship or fairplay. One of the best and easiest ways of
doing this is by watching your child at play. Observe his or her behaviour and
attitude while playing or competing with others. Watch his/her attitude towards
teammates, the opposing team, and officials of the game. Never correct him/her
while at play.

You are there as an observer and spectator. Discuss his/her
negative and positive behaviours with him/her, after the game, very wisely.
Make it a chit-chat he/she will enjoy. Do not rebuke. If the coach ignores or
encourages poor sportsmanship, as “coachitos” and “coachilas” in this part of
the world are wont to do, make your objections known to the coach privately.
Not in the presence of your child. Try to be friendly with the coach anyway, if
you are aggressive, well, God help your child when you are not around.

v. Discuss child protection policy issues with the coach.

For instance, the security of your child within the sports facility
is very crucial. The environment must be conducive. Sport is fun, even though
competitive, hence children should not receive knocks on their heads or be
caned if or when they make mistakes. Please protect your child.

More suggestions

vi. Please do not commercialise or encourage your child to
commercialise his/her potential at this early stage of his/her life.

Your child’s involvement in sports must be devoid of your own
desire to use that child’s accomplishment for commercial purposes. This has been
largely responsible for the spate of young school drop outs in this country. A
few years ago, I was forced to abort a playing tour of Europe by students of
the Brazilian Soccer Schools, when it became apparent that most of their
parents had made plans for their children to abscond on getting to Europe. As
far as those parents were concerned, completion of the secondary school
education was no priority. Those children should go start making money in
Europe.

vii. Invest in these children.

Assist with training equipment like spike shoes, air-tight
canvasses – not the hard soled type that will damage their ankles – boots, shin
guards, training shorts and shirts. Please get the right size for your
children.

For instance, it is not wise to let 10 year old children play
football with size 5 balls. There are sizes 1, 2, 3, and 4 balls for all the
age-grades.

viii. Parents must also watch what the children eat and drink.

It may be instructive to let parents know Arsene Wenger does not
allow his young players to drink tea with sugar. They are encouraged to consume
less sugar. Some dairy stuffs are also banned. Producers of “fast foods” and
some particular types of beverages are also not allowed to sponsor sporting
activities in Europe . Please protect your child from obesity.

Encourage them to eat less of cakes, dodo, and such fried stuff.
Expose them to fruits now and please encourage them to drink a lot of water.

ix. Please do not gag your child.

Children love discussing sports – especially football. Make that
child comfortable each time he/she approaches you for discussions. Allow
him/her ask questions and please, be a very good listener. Allow that child to
do the talking, while you listen. You’ll be surprised how much your child knows
about the sports he/she is involved in.

x. Please discuss sports at the next P.T.A. meeting you attend.

Encourage other parents to join you in forming the Sports and
Education Association of Nigeria, while we continue working on the modus
operandi of the Association.

xi. Your reactions are needed.

No one knows it all. Please contribute your own ideas. Your
suggestion may be that which will weave all the threads above together. Two, it
is said, is better than one.