Nigeria Content Online

Security has always
been important; but now it has become very important, especially with
the advent of elements of Boko Haram, militants and kidnappers adding
to the previously known elements of armed robbery, assassins and
ritualists. So, apart from reliance on the police, State Security
Service, Civil Defence, Customs, Immigrations, Soldiers, Airforce, Navy
and other paramilitary agencies, people need to be more conscious of
their own security.

What happens when
your assailant is part of the supposed security outfit, whether at the
border, on the high seas, in the air, on the road, in your house, in
the church, mosque, park or in the market? The next few weeks will
unveil a series of personal experiences, that are quite traumatic,
regarding the way most of our so-called security officers treat their
fellow citizens in the line of duty.

It is now time to
tell the stories of your own ‘mai-guard’ that collaborated with robbers
to raid your house; a vehicle inspection officer who, against all odds,
looks for a fault in your vehicle in order to punish you; or a
policeman you invited to investigate a breaking and entry scene but
decides to steal the items that the burglars missed. Or soldiers who
take citizens to the barracks and torture them there for weeks because
the young man chased their oga’s girlfriend. I could go on.

Let me begin with a
story that is unfolding before we unveil others. I have told you before
that my late father was a police officer. I have inherited that police
instinct from him, such that my wife always starts by accusing me of
being too suspicious and then, later she would say, I should go and
become a prophet because things usually end up as I have predicted
them. That was partly why my father said I should become a lawyer and
others said I should join the security forces. But I never knew how I
could fit in for, as a friend used to say “put a uniform upon a goat in
Nigeria and you have created another tin god or local almighty.”

A friend’s younger
brother, who has been trying to relocate to Nigeria, recently decided
to rent an apartment in Lagos early in the year. He comes in once every
three months to transact business, so he finally decided to buy a car
instead of depending on taxis. He bought the car about six months ago
in Lagos, registered it and has been driving it there. At the end of
every year, like my family, they all gather in their father’s house in
Benin. But on the way to Benin, on the 29th of last December, he was
stopped by Customs officers at Ore junction and his vehicle taken to
their Akure office.

His offence was
that he did not travel with his ‘custom duty’ papers. The man’s
explanation that he has been driving in Lagos and nobody has requested
for this particular document was unheeded. When we called some friends
to wade in and try to salvage the situation, the officers said he was
rude to them on the road, so they decided to punish him.

Masters of the game

They off-loaded his
property from the car and drove it to their Akure office. The helpful
officer said my friend’s brother could have saved himself the trouble
if he had handed out at least N1,500 and that now that the Comptroller
in the area is aware of the case, the young man risked having his car
impounded or vandalized, even if he produced the said original custom
duty papers that he had in his house in Lagos. Take note, the officers
were not peeved because he did not have the papers. They were merely
peeved because he stated that nobody ever asked for custom papers from
him in all his years of driving in Lagos, especially when he was not
driving a new car and he was not traveling outside our borders.

It is the same
scenario with a VIO officer, who stopped my car some years ago in
Gwagwalada. The young officer asked for everything, from vehicle
papers, C-caution sign and fire extinguisher. He even asked me to
“press your horn, trafficate to the left, to the right, put on the
hazard lights, match your brakes, put on the full light, dim the
light”. Then he told his colleague, “e think say we nor go catch am”.
They actually tried to stick ‘off road’ on my car for my light that
does not dim; but I resisted and we finally went into their compound in
Gwagwalada, where they proceeded to deflate my tyres. I eventually had
to part with money before I was let off the hook. The most interesting
part was the lies the four VIO officers concocted in the office and
stuck to, which left me dumbfounded.

So like the bible said, settle with your accusers before they take
you before the judges; some of whom we have discovered, with all the
recent electoral judgement, are also not clean. Secure yourself by
making sure all your vehicle papers are up to date, try to be polite to
these men and women who stand under the sun 24/7 and, worst of all, are
armed and not well remunerated. They are masters of the game. Happy new
year.