Archive for nigeriang

Grammy,Girls and me

“I’m very excited.
I think I am happier than the first time,” explains Femi Kuti whose
latest album, “Day by Day” (‘Living with History’ outside Nigeria) has
been nominated under the Best Contemporary World Music Album category
for the 2010 Grammy Awards holding on January 31.

“I’m very happy
because it’s at a point in time where politically, I need to be heard.
Since I’m having a difficult time in my country – people in Sokoto,
Delta State, the North and East don’t get to hear what I’m doing in the
Shrine; being nominated the second time shows that I have not been
sleeping. I’m a very hard worker and I think it will make people who
love me very happy.”

Is it not his fault that people outside Lagos don’t get to hear him because they believe the world market is his focus?

His father,
Afrobeat creator, Fela Anikulapo, would have loved his response. “Do
you have an industry in Nigeria? Do you have electricity in your
country? Do you have a good educational scheme? You call yourself
independent but there is no water in the cities, talk less of the
villages and towns. You think I‘m to blame? I have been exposed to good
governments and when I come back home, I become frustrated with people
who have just ‘gba kamu’ (become apathetic) that well, no light.

“I’ve released
albums many times in Nigeria and they have done a very bad job
distributing them. Many promoters believe once you release in Lagos,
that’s it. Nigeria is big; to get your music to 100 million people is
not easy.”

Femi pauses when
asked if he wants to win the award. “There is nobody that would not
love to win the Grammy but I’m happy I’m nominated. Being nominated
already for me is like winning because there are hundreds of musicians
that want to be nominated.

“My purpose in
life is not about awards. As much as I would love to win the Grammy, it
is not my objective. My objective is to play good music, to continue to
forge ahead, to pray to the creator to shower me with more new songs so
I can keep on performing around the world and for my music to be
acceptable.”

Inimitable Fela

Unlike his father
whose tracks are usually lengthy, tracks on Femi’s albums are shorter.
“Fela was the creator of Afrobeat music so he could do what he liked.
How do you, as a son, live up to such a big name? You first have to
work 10 times harder than he did and you have to understand the market.
Except you are a fanatic of Fela, you are not going to sit down and
listen to a song for 45 minutes. How did I get myself across to the
world, how did I get to the Grammy? How did I get ‘Bang Bang Bang’ to
win the KORA Award and the World Music, how did I get nominated for
awards round the world?

“It was by saying
I must take this powerful music and make it commercial. Take what Fela
did in 45 minutes and reduce it to three, five minutes and make it more
explosive. I made it have everything that hip hop, funk and rock would
have.”

Silent giver

Making donations
to, or organising fund-raisers for the less privileged with the media
in tow is the rave among players in the entertainment sector but not
many know Femi has been helping lepers at a colony close to Benin since
the 80s.

“I promised myself
in 1984 or ‘85, we were going to Benin or somewhere and there were so
many on the road but I didn’t have money. One naira then was a lot of
money and by the time I gave one of them one naira, we‘ll see another
one. They were many and I swore to myself that if I ever become rich,
I’ll always help this people.”

He has also been
sponsoring the education of some of his son, Made’sfriends. “I had the
money to send Made to a good school but the friends he likes were the
poor people in the area. By each term, his English was getting very
fluent; they were not speaking good English. Made knew mathematics; he
was getting more advanced and he was oppressing them. He didn’t realise
he was oppressing them but I could see that they all felt envious when
he is mixing with them.

“His oppression
was not self-made, it was just that his father could afford a better
school and they were looking at him as if he was a god. I didn’t want
that. So, I called him and asked if I should send them to the same
school? He was happy so I said let’s go talk to their parents. I spoke
with them but unfortunately some of their parents died. I’ve continued
to take care of them. Now they are like brothers.”

Nothing in marriage

Those expecting a
reunion between Femi and Funke, his ex-wife, may well wait till
eternity. “We are not getting back because there is nothing to get back
to. Forward ever, backwards never. We are very good friends. She even
called to congratulate me on the nomination. We are very civilised …
First, I never believed in marriage. I’m a very independent person. I
don’t want any woman to tell me what to do with my life. Don’t forget
my father married 27 wives so I know all the garaje (trickeries) of
marriage. I don’t want to be involved in that.

“I want a
situation where I’m totally independent. I don’t need a better half; I
don’t want a better half. I want to appreciate people. I have people I
appreciate and I want them to appreciate me. From when I can remember,
my mother, she loved my father gan (very much) so I saw what love did
to her. My father, he, ko ran yan se (was carefree). I don’t want to
put a woman in the kind of predicament my mother was so I always make
it clear. I like women, I’m not getting married. I don’t like all this
type of Oyinbo (western) roses. I’m not into all that. Made’s mother,
we understood. How she derailed, I don’t understand.”

The self-confessed
workaholic unabashedly discloses, “I don’t relax. When I’m going to
relax, it’s with my girlfriend; we are making love. That’s relaxation
but that one gan (in itself) is hardwork these days. Experience is the
best teacher in this life. You are always sexually excited as a young
man. When you now think about it rationally and want to play sex
properly, it is hard work. To satisfy your partner, it is hardwork
especially if you don’t have money or there are other things on your
mind.”

Reinventing Afrobeat the Aiyetoro way

I was taken aback
when midway into our conversation, Funsho Ogundipe, with a straight
face declared that, “Afrobeat is dead!” Surely, I thought Ogundipe,
leader of Ayetoro who in the late 90s, released a piano-driven,
blues-flavoured Afrobeat hit album with gems like ‘Something Dey’ and
‘Tribute to Fela’, must be deliberately putting me on. Here was the man
many music lovers and critics rightly considered as the new mature
voice of post-Fela Afrobeat, literarily biting the finger that
musically fed him.

To my relief,
Ogundipe then proffered reasons why he felt that Afrobeat was ‘dead.’
“How many people are playing Afrobeat?” he asked rhetorically “If
Afrobeat, like Jazz, wants to be relevant,” he continued “or does not
want to become museum music, it has got to incorporate the modern
sounds, whether hip hop or fuji. In Jazz there was much more onus on
the musicians to play their own beat and then improvise.” “We must
remember” he recalled, “that Fela brought musicians from various tribal
groups; a mixture of African nationalities; Nigerians, Ghanaians,
Cameroonians, Beninoise and Congolese, and they all brought the
rhythmic impetus of their people to create Afrobeat music.”

Time for change

In essence,
Ogundipe’s concern is the modernisation of Afrobeat and the need to
permanently situate the music as a lasting genre on the fast-changing
competitive international popular music scene. According to him,
Afrobeat has to change! “Early Afrobeat musicians did not want the
music to expand in terms of sound and colour,” he observed, “to use it
for cartoons and romance. It is almost ironical that Afrobeat should
only be about open protest. We have to improve on our use of irony,
satire, social meaning and have oblique lyrics.”

In the light of
such views, Ogundipe, predictably, is concerned about the negative
mindset that associates Afrobeat with hemp-smoking – an excuse for
putting the music down. “Winston Churchill did opium, Obama claimed use
of cocaine. It has cost Fela and Afrobeat dearly to be portrayed as a
drug-crazed, sex-addicted music; turning it into a monster and
depriving the music from the blood that originated it. Afrobeat at its
best is African classical music. People should not forget that all the
revolutions in music have been rhythmic. Remove the beat from Afrobeat
and, it is not there!”

Popularising Ayetoro

It is obvious that
Ogundipe’s articulate views on the state of health of Afrobeat and its
future survival and sustenance are based on further learning,
experimentation and continued experience. He left Lagos and lived in
London from 2000 to 2007 and, for the past two years, has spent six
months in Accra, Ghana and the other six in London. “I left Nigeria to
become a better musician and face more challenges. Nigeria was stifling
and I needed to play with better people, see better people play.” And
with his children now in secondary school in England, he could afford
to relocate to Ghana, “because it is close to home and it is
frightfully expensive to come home to Nigeria.”

Why? “I play the
piano for five or six hours everyday. The overheads in Accra in terms
of electricity, security, petroleum, make more sense than Lagos.”

He -as a major
shareholder, and his Ghanaian friends, own a digital production house,
Atta Productions, which provides equipment for movie and music
producers. What has been his musical direction and development over the
last decade?

“I simply took the
name Ayetoro with me and started playing with that name. As a
keyboard-accentuated Afrobeat musician, I have matured more as an
arranger, composer and piano player, and this reflects the way my music
is arranged. My models are Thelonius Monk, Duke Ellington, Sun Ra and
Miles Davis. I strive for a group sound; using individual sidemen who
have their own sound. They contribute through improvisation and they
also have to be good ensemble players and must be sympathetic to other
musicians. Up until now, the best musicians were not attracted to play
Afrobeat. It may have been for social reasons but I am changing all
that now!”

To the credit and
influences of ex-Fela drummer Tony Allen and keyboardist Ogundipe, many
more bands in Europe and America are now playing music with distinct
Afrobeat roots. In London, Ayetoro developed a reputation for live
shows. His first gig in England in 2002, was the Africa Oye Festival;
the biggest world music festival in Europe held in Liverpool. He has
also played at the famous 100 Club on Oxford Street, London.

What are the new
flavours in his music? “I do not know what name to give my music. Not
Afrobeat; maybe ‘Naija Blues’ which is the title of my first album. The
music I play now satisfies my yearning for structure and improvisation
at the same time. Not one-chord music like old Afrobeat; which was
restrictive. I use the structure of 12-bar blues, diminished chords and
whole tones to improve the musical colouristic choice available.

I strongly believe in discipline in music. My old album ‘Something Dey’ involved tension release.”

Ogundipe has grown
into a musician that straddles many worlds. In Ghana, he was appointed
musical director and principal composer of the Culture Caravan
Initiative of the French Embassy and Vodafone that took concert
parties, live band and a play on stage across Ghana. “I had to create
atmospheric sounds, not just sweet sounds, but music in totality,” he
recalls. He then took a 14-piece band called Afrobitten that included
dancers and singers to the Alliance Francaise in Accra.

Exciting generation

What is his opinion
on the calibre of young musicians now on the scene in Nigeria? “There
is an exciting new generation of young musicians in Nigeria from the
Muson Music School, who have the discipline of classical music training
and can play and improvise. Since 1998, half of the musicians I worked
with in Nigeria were from the Peter King School of Music. I think it
will be musically rewarding to have Nigerian hip hop singers play with
learned musicians.”

Ogundipe’s recently released albums successfully demonstrate his
immense musical growth in one decade as well as show in energy and
musical diversity, the futuristic directions of the ‘new’ Afrobeat. He
directs the music with maturity and confident expertise from keyboards,
piano, Wurlitzer electric piano and Fender Rhodes electric piano.
‘Afrobeat Chronicles’ (Vol 1) subtitled ‘The Jazz Side of Afrobeat’
features Byron Wallen, a prominent non-American jazz trumpeter in the
Diaspora. ‘Afrobeat Chronicles’ (Vol 2) subtitled ‘Omo Obokun’ in
reference to his Ilesha roots, features a choir of expatriate Cuban
bata drummers and percussionists who play two rhythms; one for ‘Iyesha’
[As Ijesha people pronounce it] and the other for twins (Ibeji).

Ministering healing through songs

Worship, comedy,
music and health were at the heart of the ‘Praise Along with Femi
Micah’ concert. A series of shows scheduled to take place across
various Nigerian university campuses, the first held on Thursday, March
11 at the University of Lagos.

The programme,
which also involved testing and counselling sessions on ailments like
diabetes, cancer, and hypertension, pulled a large crowd from within
and outside the university community.

Showtime at the Main Auditorium

On the bill of
performers were the host himself, Femi Micah and comedian Holy Mallam.
Starting the musical run was singer and Ewi musician Damola Adesina.
Paying homage to God in His various names, she quoted copiously from
the Bible before breaking into song and praising the name of God. The
applause that followed her performance was near-ecstatic but would go
higher before the end of the evening.

Upcoming acts Kenny
K’ore, Sanmi Michael and Bolaji Sax had the opportunity to strut their
stuff. Bolaji Sax’s proficiency on the wind-instrument blew the
audience away with his style and a medley of contemporary indigenous
and foreign Christian tunes. The grateful audience sang along,
providing the words to his instrumental symphony. The fast-paced tempo
of K’ore’s and Michael’s performances also proved the event was no
place for ‘dull’ worship.

Offering prayers
that, given a different circumstance would seem like curses, popular
comedian Holy Mallam had the audience reeling in laughter. He set the
stage for other comic acts of the evening: First Born, Helen Paul, Fat
Jerry and Cee D. John. First Born’s act had the audience reminiscing on
the “good ol’ days” and the differences between children brought up in
wealth or in poverty. Cee D. John’s mimicry of ‘village-influenced’
worship was, however, the evening’s comic highlight.

Young dance group
Xquizit gave an energetic and inspiring solo performance and back-up
act to musician Funke Akinokun’s performance. Akinokun spiced up her
act with praises to God in Nigeria’s major languages, before delving
into upbeat melodies that kept the audience on its feet.

Saxophonist Segun
Oluwayomi was last on the list of musicians before the evening’s
headlining act. Building on the pace of other performers, Oluwayomi’s
string of tunes was all the audience needed to bring them full circle
for the act of the night.

The Man of the Hour

Guests had
gradually been trickling into the main auditorium as the event went on.
It was almost at full capacity when top-billed act, Femi Micah, got on
stage at around 8pm. He was welcomed with a roaring, standing ovation.

Performing songs
from his Live Recording album, ‘Praise Along with Femi Micah’, the
artist had the audience perpetually on its feet; clapping, waving and
dancing, as offering to the Almighty God. But in the midst of praise,
forces with other interests seemed to be at play. During Micah’s praise
medley and at the height of the audience’s frenzy, the sound went off.
If not for the fierce drumming of the traditional drummers, the music
would have died.

Send in the clowns

The break in
transmission, however, seemed to the advantage of some. It provided a
quartet of young men the opportunity to ‘strut their stuff’ on stage.
While it was not the best of dancing, it was a bit of a distraction
from the lack of sound on stage.

This side
attraction and Micah’s attempt at involving the audience in some
clapping and waving did not stop almost half of the house from trooping
out, though. For those left in the house, however, there was no slowing
down when the sound was eventually restored. Rounding off with the
interrupted medley and one more track from his album, Micah ended his
act for the evening.

Micah had made his
audience’s evening with songs like ‘Holy, Holy’; ‘Immortal God’,
‘Mighty God’ and ‘I will lift your Name Higher’, all from his new
album. It was probably not so new, though, as the audience was singing
along smoothly.

Your health and You

It was not just a
night for music. At the entrance to the venue, a crowd of students
could be seen at various testing locations. The centres had been
stationed to provide diagnostic and counselling services to all those
who had attended, especially the students.

Pastor and breast
cancer survivor, Sola Adeoti, of the MariaSam medical and counselling
team, advised regular testing and check ups to prevent the onset of
certain potentially life-threatening ailments. She encouraged those who
had tested positive or were at risk of some of the ailments not to be
afraid but to immediately commence treatment or seek preventive
measures that would ensure a normal life post-diagnosis.

In the closing
remarks of Saheed Ogunsola, a pastor with the Redeemed Christian Church
of God, the event had a purpose to fulfil. “The purpose of this
programme is not to entertain you, but for the uplifting of your soul;
to connect you to the source of your life, so that you’ll never run
dry.”

With laughter, praise and healing, the concert is on its way to fulfilling that purpose.

Other concerts and counselling sessions are scheduled for the
Olabisi Onabanjo University in Ogun State; the University of Ibadan,
Oyo State and the Obafemi Awolowo University in Ile-Ife, Osun State.

The enchanting Victoria Oruwari

It was an enchanting evening with Victoria Oruwari at the MUSON
Centre on Sunday, February 21. Performing selected songs from the classical
period and more contemporary West End Musicals, the visually-challenged Oruwari
enthralled the audience with her voice and magnetic stage presence.

The recital kicked off at 6pm prompt as promised. Before the
night was over, many could decipher a theme to the evening’s performance.
Oruwari, a trained soprano, was accompanied by Babatunde Sosan on the piano.

Both graduates of the Trinity College of Music, London, it was
their first time performing together in Nigeria. What the audience was getting
that night was a result of a week of solo and two days of joint rehearsals.

What followed was no pointer to this. Oruwari started off with
‘Tornami a Vagheggiar’ an aria from Act 1 of George Handel’s ‘Alcina’.
Translated as ‘Return to me to languish’, the aria is the story of an unlikely
love triangle between two women and a man. With this love song, Oruwari grabbed
the audience’s attention and did not let go till an hour and a half later. She
followed this with ‘De Vieni Non Tardar’ (Oh Come, Don’t delay) from Mozart’s
‘The Marriage of Figaro’.

Oruwari obviously enjoyed teasing the audience with how high her
voice could go, tackling Rossini’s ‘La Pastorella’ with the dexterity of a
primadonna and working her vocal muscles in Bizet’s ‘Comme autre fois’.
Charlotte Church could not have delivered better renditions of the aria from
‘Les Soirees Musicales.’

Before the interval, Sosan treated the audience to a piano solo,
‘La Cathedral Engloutie’ (The sunken cathedral), a prelude by Claude Debussy.
In Sosan’s rendition, the listener gets a feel of the cathedral bobbing up in
the sea, the bells signalling time for mass and the priests as they officiate.
The music rose and fell to depict the appearance of the cathedral and its
eventual disappearance from sight.

Summertime

The second part of the recital was dedicated to contemporary
Broadway and West End musicals. First up was the popular jazz lullaby
‘Summertime’ from George Gershwin’s ‘Porgy and Bess’. The only thing missing
from Oruwari’s version was Louis Armstrong on the trumpet. This, however, did
not reduce the jazzy feel the composers’ intended for any performance of this
stage classic. Oruwari could as well have been Ella Fitzgerald.

Fans of Andrew Lloyd Webber were placated with ‘Think of Me’
from the evergreen ‘Phantom of the Opera.’ In this musical, the revelation of
Christine Daae as the new star of the Opera Populaire becomes almost
indisputable after she sings this song. In a voice that could upstage nearly
any diva, Oruwari entranced the Agip Recital Hall’s audience and had them
clapping as the song finished.

True to her promise to perform songs by Stephen Sondheim in the
composer’s honour, Oruwari performed back-to-back hits from ‘The Follies’,
‘Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street’ and ‘Into the Woods.’

Apart from being a fan of Sondheim’s, Oruwari’s tribute was also
in early celebration of the renowned composer’s 80th birthday anniversary
coming up in March.

Losing my mind

First in line was ‘Losing my Mind,’ from ‘The Follies’.
Questioning her state of mind, Sally sings this song about her unrequited love
for Ben. Oruwari adds some drama to her delivery, as she turns left or right to
the lines of the song: ‘Not going left – not going right’

Next in the Sondheim tribute was ‘No one is alone’ from ‘Into
the Woods’. In the notes accompanying songs in her line-up, Oruwari writes, “In
this musical, Sondheim and Lapine explore the darker and more complex elements
that exist in fairy tales and relate them to things that occur in real life.
They ensure that all the fairy tale used in this musical are true to the
original. No one is Alone is sung by Cinderella in her maternal role of
comforter to the lost characters in the woods.”

The plot is drawn from many of the Brothers Grimm’s fairy tales
and in its musical performance, more enchantment is added to the already
enthralling stories.

A playful but disturbing tune was ‘Green Finch and Linnet Bird’
from Sondheim’s ‘Sweeney Todd’ musical. Sung by an imprisoned Johanna when she
cites a bird singing by her window, the song is more about herself in captivity
than about the singing bird. But Johanna concludes, “If I cannot fly, let me
sing.” And sing Oruwari does.

I feel pretty

Concluding the Sondheim tribute was ‘I Feel Pretty’ from West
Side Story, Leonard Bernstein’s musical adaptation of Shakespeare’s tragic
romance ‘Romeo and Juliet’ with lyrics by Stephen Sondheim. The words reflect
Maria’s happiness at going to the ball, a feeling Oruwari embodies on stage and
dramatises to full effect with her voice, especially when she sang, ” I feel
fiszzy and funny and fine, and so pretty, Miss America can just resign!”

This performance was rewarded with the loudest applause of the
evening. Oruwari, however, reminded us in the programme notes that this song is
Sondheim’s least favourite.

The presumed conclusion to the evening was Oruwari’s performance
of ‘Much More’ from Harvey Schmidt’s ‘The Fantasticks’. Like the heroines of
the previous songs, Luisa ‘spends her time daydreaming of a more exciting life
than the one she is living.’ Part of this song’s opening lines read, “I am
special. I am special. Please, God, please don’t ever let me be normal!” The
audience could not resist applauding and saying, “Yes, you are,” to the truly
special Victoria Oruwari.

Giving a standing ovation for what they thought was the last
song of the night; Oruwari surprised everyone by giving probably one of the
best renditions of popular folk song, ‘Oluronbi.’ It was a fitting conclusion
to an enchanting evening.

Speaking after the event, Oruwari justified her very inclusive
choice of songs, “My aim with my music is to integrate people more and to let
everybody come to my concert and enjoy what they hear.”

No one could deny their enjoyment of the evening.

Studio Visit will return next week.

Jos refugees hit by diarrhoea

Jos refugees hit by diarrhoea

By Alex Emeje

March 25, 2010 03:50AM

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Residents of Plateau State who were displaced during the
violence in and around Jos city have been hit by diarrhoea and other forms of
diseases at their camps in Boto, Bauchi State.

Bala Yakubu, the Bauchi State Search and Rescue officer
disclosed this in Abuja.

He said the camps are facing an acute shortage of drugs to
combat the diseases.

According to him, medical personnel at the camps have run out of
drugs that were provided by the state government.

There are currently four camps operated by the State Emergency
Management Agency in Boto.

In Camp A, there are 1, 673 refugees, 170 in Camp B, all of
whom, he said arrived after the crisis in Jos .

He said the latest crisis caused an influx of 4,565 people,
mostly women and children who are now in Camp D.

Responding, the Director- General of the Governors’ forum, Bayo
Okauru, promised that the secretariat would look into how to provide more
relief materials to the camps and reach out to the governor, Isa Yuguda .

Mr.Okauru also told Mr. Yakubu to give him a list of what they
need so that he can forward it to the state governor.

Court orders stay of proceeding in libel case

Court
orders stay of proceeding in libel case

By Edwin Olofu

March 25, 2010 03:19AM

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The presiding judge of the Kano High Court, Haliru Abdullahi has
ordered a stay of proceedings on a libel suit instituted against the
multinational drug outfit, Pfizer.

Idris Mohammed, a professor of medicine had alleged that he had
been defamed by the content of Pfizer’s statement of defence in a suit brought
against the company. In the libel case filed against the company he is
demanding ₦120 million as damages against Pfizer.

Mr. Mohammed was mentioned severally in the statement of defence
filed by Pfizer as a result of the 1996 Trovan clinical trial in the outbreak
of meningitis epidemic in some northern states.

Prayer granted

Justice Abdullahi ruled in favour of Pfizer’s application for a
stay of proceedings on the matter pending when the Federal Court of Appeal in
Kaduna rule on an appeal filed by Pfizer’s lawyers on September 22 last year.

The decision came after Ado Balarabe Mahmoud who stood in for
Mr. Abdullahi prayed the court not to fall for Pfizer’s delay tactics in the
case at the Kaduna Court of Appeal.

Nelson Uzuegbu, who stood in for Pfizer, had in a 10 paragraph
affidavit applied for a stay of proceedings pending the determination of the
substantive suit at the court of appeal. He cited order 8, rule 47 and section
36 of the constitution to justify his demand.

Mr. Uzuegbu enjoined the judge to preserve the integrity of hierarchy of the
court since the appeal court is yet to determine the issue bordering the
substitution of the name of Pfizer in the libel case.

Reps deny summoning Libyan envoy

Representatives suspend debate on budget

HABIBA’S HABITAT: Expert Expats

HABIBA’S HABITAT: Expert Expats

By Habiba Balogun

March 25, 2010 03:17AM

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It is great being an expatriate. You are away from the societal
pressures of your home country, and the ‘ties that bind’. You are free to
reinvent yourself as you wish. All the people who knew you growing up and who
had pegged and pigeonholed you as a certain type of person are no longer there
to force you to conform to the way you previously defined yourself. You are
liberated from those shackles.

At the Moorhouse Hotel on Sunday, I witnessed two French
expatriates here working technical jobs, pursuing their true vocations as ‘cool’
musicians playing the guitar, the saxophone and the flute. They were part of a
trio of jazz musicians who treated the brunch crowd to Bossa Nova standards,
Desafinado, and French Jazz classic, la vie en rose. The third person was
Nigerian, a gifted guitarist. It was a wonderful and energising time out.

It is great to be an expatriate regardless of your gender. For
the men, be you 28 or 68, you are forever young. Starting new jobs, engaging in
new responsibilities, taking on new pursuits, and entering new relationships
with mature and adventurous fellow world travellers or with young, beautiful,
ambitious and exotic local girls. Ah, la vie est belle! Just this weekend, I
heard from one of the arm-candy girls that the expatriate men are experts at
managing the balancing act of those relationships with young girls.

Venezuelan men are hard to tempt. Their girls back home are as
feline and assertive as ours, and have beautiful faces and bodies too. Germans,
Americans, and Englishmen are true connoisseurs of the West African beauty.
Women are women are women – they are looking for the same qualities that they
seek in a woman back home, plus that ‘je ne sais quoi’ exotic quality that
stands them out in a crowd, and makes them feel the way ‘true men’ are supposed
to feel. It has to be love, though.

Frenchmen, on the other hand, are reputedly tricky!!!! The word
on the street amongst the girls is that the men initiate those relationships
purely to have fun! ‘Quelle horreur!!’ There are exceptions, of course. I hate
stereotypes as a rule, but I have to be true to the reports I have received.
The French dangle a journey to Paris on one hand and the possibility of
marriage on the other, stringing the lady along for years sometimes, before
neither materialise. The francophone girls are NOT amused!!! They believe that
a Frenchman is more likely to marry an elegant and exposed black girl bred in
France than one from our shores.

Gentlemen, is this true?

As for the expatriate ladies, it is both a wonderful and
terrifying experience, but it is never dull!!! How many of us working women or
even housewives would love to leave it all behind and take off to a country
where your husband’s skills (usually), sometimes your own, are needed. You are
an expert, you are valued, you are treasured and looked after and pampered.
Your health and your recreation are the focus of meetings by managing directors
and HR directors of multinational companies.

Nothing less than a three-bedroom apartment in a complex with a
playground and swimming pool is good enough for you. You are assigned a driver
to take you shopping and convey you anywhere you wish to go. You are assigned a
cook/steward to ensure that you do not strain yourself seeking to feed yourself
and your family, and so that you can immediately become an expert hostess for
the inescapable social round of parties, teas, cocktails and dinners to further
your partner’s career. If you have children, you MUST have a nanny so that you
can focus on your health and beauty and QUALITY time with the children. You can
let someone else do the routine stuff. What a hardship! What is lovely is that
you get the time you need to further your interests, whether in philanthropy,
fashion, education, art or sport. Many expatriates who spent time in Nigeria learnt
to sail in Lagos Lagoon, according to John and Jill Godwin, the notable
architect couple who can proudly call themselves Nigerian-British after
residing here for over 50 years. Many have also picked up golf and discovered
unimagined and rewarding new skills and talents here.

This is where the terrifying part of being an expatriate partner
comes in. You really do need to stay healthy, beautiful and active.

You had better play golf and tennis and keep your bikini body
looking good, or work towards those two-pack abdominal muscles (six-pack may be
asking for too much) because you and your partner are ordinary to each other,
in an unusual environment. Yet you are each viewed as unusual and desirable in
the eyes of others. Which regard would YOU prefer? To retain your partner’s
affection, you have to compete with all the colleagues, subordinates, service
providers, and young men and women seeking the favour and the liquid currency
of your partner.

We all assume that expatriates have more money than regular
mortals. After all, they get all kinds of extra allowances and incentives for
working away from home. They generally have most of their local bills taken
care of or are living in a place where the cost of living is much lower than
their country.

If they are renting out their own home rather than maintaining
two, as some choose to do, their income can far exceed their expenditure.
Besides which they live in good homes, drive new cars, and love doing fun and
adventurous things. There are a whole raft of people on standby and eager to
help you spend your ready cash, or keen to divert it from its rightful
recipients to themselves. So, watch out! And fellow expatriates, the
experienced ones, are experts in giving you a helpful push into that sinkhole
of expat exploitation, degradation and ruin. Hey, they need your company there
to feel good about the antics that they are up to themselves. I won’t go into
the widespread salacious and sometimes tragic stories of what happens in
expatriate compounds all over the world. The US TV series, Desperate
Housewives, and the new UK series, Mistresses, have nothing on it.

To be fair, expatriates still have a lot to learn about
convoluted love triangles, thwarted passion, agonising betrayals and extreme
measures to capture and keep a desirable partner. Our domestic movie industry,
Nollywood, can educate them in that regard and show them endings in tears,
recriminations, and broken homes.

We hear you, we empathise with you, we feel you as you face your
unique travails during your residency here. There is something called expat
culture that explains the inevitability of many of the situations you find
yourselves in. They are a function of being brought into a different
environment as an expert expat or as the companion of one. We, the locals,
don’t co-operate as we ought to either. Don’t take it personally. It is not
about you; it is about your status as a transient guest, here to sample a
facsimile of our lives and then move on, abruptly cutting the fragile ties and
dependencies that have formed.

There are more advantages than disadvantages to being an expatriate, and
Nigerian expats enjoy them and suffer them too when they are posted or hired on
contract abroad. The trick is, not all foreigners here are expatriates. If you
are one of us, enjoy the benefits but avoid the traps of the expatriate
lifestyle; and if you are an expatriate, especially you French guys….be
nice!!!!

NITEL workers protest irregular promotion

NITEL workers protest irregular promotion

By Jide Jegede

March 24, 2010 02:36AM

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As the sale of the Nigerian Telecommunication Plc
(NITEL) to private investors is mired in controversy, scores of the
company’s staff in Ibadan, the Oyo State capital, on Tuesday, staged a
peaceful protest against an alleged clandestine confirmation of
appointment and promotion of some top management staff.

The workers called on the federal government to intervene promptly and stop the purported promotions.

According to the protesters, the promotion will
further complicate the problem of the company when it is finally handed
over to the new owner.

While pleading with the federal government to effect
the payment of a backlog of salaries and allowances, the workers
accused it of contravening a court order which compelled it to
regularise the employment of staff who have remained casual employees
for the past 15 years and pay all their entitlements.

Ganiyu Shittu, the state chairman of the workers,
said since the order was given on 6 November, 2008 the government is
yet to implement it.

The workers said 25 March will mark the 21st month since the government last paid their monthly salaries.

Selective promotion

The staff alleged that senior officers confirmed
their own appointment and embarked on “promotion of some selected staff
to disorganise them”.

Insisting that the exercise was ill-timed, the
workers called for the intervention of the Federal Government, National
Assembly and Bureau of Public Enterprises and other Nigerians in the
matter.

“We wish to draw the attention of the Federal
Government, National Assembly, BPE and other Nigerians to the recent
unpleasant decisions of the top management wherein all the top
management staff had their appointments quietly and hurriedly confirmed
immediately after the last bidding process was concluded by the BPE.

“It is worrisome that at a time when NITEL staff are
appealing daily for the payment of the 20 months salary arrears owed
them by the government and BPE, the top management believes this is the
right time for them to confirm all their acting appointments and pacify
a selected few with promotions on the eve of handling over the company
to a new core investor,” the workers stated.

They also accused the government of not being fair to them by
delaying the payment of their salaries till it gets the proceeds from
the sale of NITEL, saying such was not the case with workers of other
privatised government companies like Ajaokuta Steel Company and the
Nigeria Airways.