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After
the UEFA Championship League finals when Inter Milan’s coach announced
that he would be joining Real Madrid, I had my first M word. His
statement brought the phrase from the movie Jerry McGuire to my mind
show me the money.

So my first M word is money. What? You didn’t think it was Mourinho, did you?

Everyone can tell a story about money. There’s one
for when we have it, one for when we lacked it and one for when we were
at that parking lot and it was right there near our car asking to be
picked up.

The stories from women in relationships with
someone wealthy are usually about ladies running after their men. While
the women in relationships where they aren’t as wealthy, tell stories
with pursed lips and a hint of regret about how they could have been
with Shehu, who is now the Governor of some statesome state.

Whatever the stories, money is important in every
relationship because it determines what decisions we make, from how
much time we spend together to where we live and the car we drive.

That being said, I want to explore a different
side of money; the side that subtly reminds me of a mistress and should
be picked up on.

We spend hours at work daily. We are constantly
looking for ways to make money. We juggle many things and many men,
particularly those abroad, find themselves holding down multiple jobs,
working night shifts and the women sleep alone night after night. This
time, the woman taking him away, is money.

When he finally comes home, he’s fatigued and
however alluring your negligee, Mr. Man needs his beauty sleep.
Besides, junior is already whimpering in his bed anyway, so you have to
get up there and then.

Resentment soon begins to build because you hardly
see him and you are tired of words like ‘ Honey, I’m doing it for us’,’
I have to work all weekend on a show’, ‘I need that overtime’.

In some cases, where you do see him, he’s snapping
about every item that is finished in the house whichhouse, which does
nothing to help the fact that you are tired of lonely nights and need
some.

You scamper from here and there and devise new
ways to make what you have last a little while longer but it is just
never enough.

The pettiest things set you both off and you argue
on top of your voices when money is absent. Not to mention the
frustration of holding off those passionate dreams that once meant the
world to you but would never see fruition without money.

Evidently, we need money to live, however, we must
realise that money will never be enough and so we ought to actively
ensure that it doesn’t take over our lives.

Studies state money as a major cause of broken
relationships but I think it can also be the glue that keeps them
together with proper planning, budgeting, becoming and staying debt
free so that we enjoy our marriages.

And there is my other M word; Marriage. I could
not have an A-Z series on marriage without it. After all, the goal of
marriage is staying married.

What we encounter as we navigate through sometimes
murky waters in marriage varies and how we relate with money can help
the navigation process.

I personally define marriage as the welding
together of two hearts, lives and people so that they are inseparable
and learn to live as one.

The learning experience is long, emotion packed
and worth every step because nothing on earth beats the knowledge that
this one person gets you, flaws and all yet willingly holds on to your
hand whispering, I’ll walk life’s road with you anyway.

Money well managed, makes marriage that much more magnificent.

M is for Money and Marriage!