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Phoné (pronounced
‘phonéh’) is slang for phonetics. It refers to that jarring American or
British, German or French accent that some of us adopt.

Perhaps we do it to
feel cool, to be more easily understood or to differentiate ourselves
from everyone else by seeming well-travelled and cosmopolitan.

Who knows what the
motivation for abandoning one’s native accent for a foreign one is,
when we have never left our shores and when we already speak well.

Phoné is funny
because if those really are the objectives, speaking in that affected
way does not help you achieve what you want. To the contrary, instead
of looking cool, you look foolish. Instead of being easily understood,
your speech becomes undecipherable and therefore incomprehensible.
Instead of seeming ‘exposed’, you differentiate yourself as a person
who is aping foreigners in speech rather than in attitude and behaviour.

Imagine speaking to
someone here from the same neigbourhood as you in a deep southern Texan
accent. He will look you up and down and first confirm what his eyes
are telling him, that you are ‘one of us’. Then, he will decide if you
are play-acting, choosing to confound or patronise him or if you are a
lost soul who has turned your back on our culture and are yearning to
live another life as a new person in a different country. The bottom
line is that you are not speaking his language to him, so you are not
seeking to build rapport or reach an understanding.

The results of
affected speech vary greatly. The reaction you receive could be
admiration at the discipline required to deviate from your natural
intonation shown by your masterful delivery of the heavy twang. You
could suffer derision, scorn, laughter, sideways looks of amazement,
and a “what’s wrong with this guy?” More frequently, you could be
cruelly dismissed as a superficial person who does not know the value
of who they are and the culture they are from.

The problem with
phoné is that, unless you have spent more than six months at a time
living abroad and have picked up the local lingo or accent, it is
phoney!!!! People can tell. Language is so much more than just words
and sounds. It is culture. It is a way of life; methods of reasoning;
modes of reacting. It is appreciation for things not found on our
shores, unfamiliar perspectives and different attitudes to time
keeping, formality, showing respect, and hierarchy. Language determines
whether we approach subjects directly or in a roundabout manner. It can
determine whether we are soft spoken or brash.

It only really
works if you are speaking with foreigners or if you have travelled
overseas and are speaking with the natives there. Then, the intonation
and rhythm of speech you adopt is an approximation to theirs. They find
it comforting and welcoming, if somewhat amusing at times and they
generally respond positively to it.

There is absolutely
nothing wrong with phone. As a linguist, I find myself unconsciously
taking on the accent of the person I am speaking to, or of the
environment I find myself in. Being adaptable, both in speech, gestures
and behaviour smoothens the way when interacting with others.

Stick with your own

When in your own
culture, stick with your own phonetics regardless of whom you are
dealing with. Simply focus on speaking clearly and correctly. Build
your knowledge about the world around you. Read, watch documentaries
and enrich the content of your conversations. Remember all those
aspirations you had to feel cool, to be more easily understood, to
differentiate yourself from everyone else by seeming well-travelled and
cosmopolitan – they will all come true.

Oh yes, if you are
learning a foreign language the easiest way to master it is to lay on
full phoné when practicing. Not just the words, but also the gestures,
the attitude, and the flair of the culture the language is used in. It
works.

Another trick is to
try replying in English to someone who is speaking to you in your
language. Make sure that when you reply you use the same rhythms, head
and arm movements, facial expressions and tones as your language. The
other person may not realise for a long while, or at all, that you are
not speaking in vernacular.

Just ask our
politicians. They figured it out a long time ago. They come to your
area, pepper their speech with words in your language, use your
proverbs, sing one of your traditional songs, do some of your
distinctive dance steps, and you are convinced that they are ‘one of
us’. Give it a try and see what happens. Meanwhile, it is all phoné.

Phoné can be funny, but it is also very powerful. Use it wisely! In
a mixed group, use phoné with the foreigners and be natural with your
countrymen. They will all be wowed by your prowess!